A Brief History of Dating

7 mins read. Written by Judith Louis.

A Brief History Of Dating

Personal ads in newspapers

In today’s world when printed newspapers are slowly dying out it's hard to imagine that there was a whole dating culture that surrounded personal ads in newspapers. Personal ads refer to the kinds of private advertisements that used to be placed in newspapers by people who were seeking a romantic partner.

The personal ads would catch the attention of those interested and they would then proceed to contact the person who placed the ad. Personal ads were especially popular during World War 1 when soldiers used to place ads in newspapers to take their minds off of the lonely battlefields.

This was so popular in fact that “The Lonely Soldiers Movement” as it was so aptly dubbed swept across most if not all British forces during that time. The trend of personal ads continued quite well into the 2000s thanks to the rise and invention of platforms like Craiglist. On Craiglist, users could create and post their own classified ads. So a few people took to posting their own personal ads on them as well.

Introduction of matchmaking services

Matchmaking can be dated back to as early as the 1600s in Britain with the common practice of strategic marriages.

Strategic marriages are very much like what you’ve seen in period dramas where marriage is used to strengthen alliances, create dominance, or secure wealth and status.

With little respect given to the wants of brides and grooms, arrangements were made for them and thus the idea of matchmaking was formed. However, matchmaking has changed lots in the last few decades. What was first a ploy to gain power was now an esteemed and highly regarded method for young people to meet one another.

This was especially because up until the late 20th century — when social norms surrounding dating were beginning to be challenged — a young couple couldn’t openly date one another.

Think of Netflix’s hit show Bridgerton. Many a time a man and woman on the show are only allowed to promenade or be in each other's company with a chaperone present. This was why matchmaking services were so popular because since young people couldn’t court openly, they had to rely on matchmakers to seek out the most suitable matches.

Today there is less need for matchmakers because of the rise of dating apps but they aren’t completely obsolete. Some still rely on matchmaking especially when they are pressured by the cultural social norms surrounding marriage.

Video Dating

You might or might not have heard of video dating before but some would say that its frameworks paved the way for modern dating apps.

With video dating, an agency would record a single as they asked them questions. The questions would be about their personality, what they looked for in a partner, and their basic information.

After they had recorded this information, they added their tape to a library of tapes featuring other singles. The idea was that these singles who were looking for romantic relationships would go through the video library and pick out the partners they feel best fits them.

See how video dating might have paved the way for modern dating now?

One great example of video dating was the agency Great Expectations. Along with their videotapes featuring singles, they also included a one-page cover letter that included personal details like height, career and etc.

Great Expectations was spearheaded by then 26-yr old founder, Jeff Ulman, who believed the video medium would represent a more honest picture of the people it featured.

The emergence of online dating

Now here is where we enter into the era of online dating that most closely resembles the dating habits of today.

Back in the 1980s, there used to be online bulletin board systems that allowed people to chat online before they met in person. Although these systems were slow, especially when compared to today's standards, they still allowed people to meet digitally before they met physically.

With the rise of the internet and the advances in technology, more people saw the potential of moving dating from offline to online. Kiss.com was one of those trailblazers.

They were the first modern dating website created in 1994 and were closely followed by Match.com in 1995.

The Emergence of Social Media and How It Affected Dating

Long before there was Facebook, Twitter and Instagram there was Friendster and Myspace. The two platforms that were launched in 2003 pioneered the world of online social networking platforms.

With the emergence of these sites many — especially young people of the noughties— used them as a way to keep in touch with friends, family, and a crush or two.

These sites made it easier to approach people you were interested in and gave you the opportunity to possibly grow your relationships. There were even whole relationships built without ever knowing who was on the other side of the screen.

Eventually, with the launching of Facebook, these websites became obsolete but they can still be credited for having started a whole generation of online daters.

The Emergence of Dating Apps

So how did we enter the era of dating apps?

Well actually, dating apps were said to have originated in the LGBTQ+ community in 2009. It allowed singles to find others in the community within a specific geographical radius they were also in.

Soon after, Tinder was launched in 2012 which took inspiration from the framework of apps launched in 2009.

After seeing the success of these apps, many started coming up with their own apps and now there is no shortage of dating apps to fit your every want and preference.

So how does Kopi Date fit into all this?

With the emergence of online dating apps, there were also issues that arose with it. Some of them include more and more dating app users who no longer shared the same motivations for being on their respective platforms.

Some were there to find true romantic connections, whilst others were there for personal gratification.

The emergence of dating apps also caused a new dating culture where things like ghosting and catfishing were more prevalent.

You can read more about the issues surrounding dating apps and why they might not be the starting point of your love story here.

Dating wants to be the solace amongst these options and be a community for like-minded individuals to meet and enjoy one another's company. Our goal is not to find you a partner but it’s instead to facilitate meeting new face-to-face people and having amazing conversations with them.

Through these conversations, we hope you meet someone you can authentically connect with and a relationship — whether friendly or romantic — may be able to bloom.