The Growth vs Destiny Belief

3 mins read. Written by Manvinder Kaur.

Growth vs Destiny Belief:
How having the right mindset might change your destiny forever…

If you listen to any number of love songs, dating “experts,” or dive headfirst into a romance novel, you’re prone to believe that finding that special someone — your soulmate — is in your destiny.

But how can you know whether you’ve met “the one”? Will the birds begin to sing? Will you be able to view fireworks or a shooting star?

And for those who have yet to find “the one,” should you keep looking, or is it a fruitless endeavor?

 

NOW’S THE TIME TO

Embrace adventures & new possibilities

 

The Destiny Belief

“Romantic compatibility is destined. It’s either there, or it is not”

Destiny beliefs assume that two people are either well-suited for each other and destined to live happily ever after, or they are not. This assumes innate compatibility. It was simply not meant to be if the relationship did not work out.

This is a widespread belief among individuals who believe in the power of fate in relationships. People who believe in destiny think that they will know early on in a relationship if they are destined to be together and if the relationship will work out. In Hollywood films, we find a lot of destiny beliefs. Did you know that watching more films like these can really make individuals more likely to believe in fate?

The Growth Belief

“Romantic compatibility is the matter of effort.”

A person with growth beliefs welcomes obstacles and sees failures as opportunities to learn more regarding dating and relationships. Specifically, the capacity to love seems to be something individuals grow throughout their lifetime. Therefore, challenges create opportunities for stronger connections to form.

If you have growth beliefs, the route of being more loving is both tough and rewarding. You get out of bed excited to see what lessons life has in store for you and what you can learn.

Growth beliefs assume that good relationships are a result of hard work. This assumes that compatibility is cultivatable. Couples work hard to overcome obstacles, and if you put in enough effort, any relationship can flourish.

“Relationships are hard work!” my mother would say.

These Beliefs and Dating

Having destiny beliefs may make a person less open to developing a relationship with someone who has many great attributes but does not match a person’s mental image of “the one.” The individual would also be more likely to concentrate on the possible flaws or shortcomings of others rather than their strong points.

As a result, those who believe in destiny may avoid pursuing a potential love interest in the hopes that someone better would come along that matches their idea of destiny. They may reject genuine opportunities to find love if they keep their destiny beliefs.

On the other hand, people that hold growth beliefs take a longer-term approach to relationships and dating. They were less likely to have hook-ups and more likely to date the same individual for an extended period of time. In short, persons with higher growth beliefs were less inclined to feel that they could learn something about a person quickly, preferring to invest time in developing the relationship and getting to know a person.

Try to adopt growth beliefs, and you might be changing your course in your dating life!

Want to find out what are your relationship beliefs? Take the quiz below to find out!


Kopi Date is a startup that curates thoughtful 1:1 coffee dates at unique spaces in Singapore.

Simply share with us your story; what makes you, you. When your date has been scheduled, turn up at our partnered unique spaces for your date! You’ll be served with a complimentary coffee and a Kopi Date experience kit.

Kopi Date is a step away from the frustrations of online dating, transforming the overly digitised process into a humanised experience.